GAY TEEN THOUGHTS
As a gay, 15 year old, I know what it's like to go to school and try to get through the day hearing little comments and cuts against gays coming from the other kids...and even the teachers.
I know what it's like to get online and check out a gay chat room... only to be immediately whispered to about my physical stats and whether I'm "cut" or not.
I know what it's like to be hanging with a new group of friends at the mall or a restaurant... and suddenly get the cold shoulder as soon as the fact that I'm gay comes up.
I know what it's like to go to a church to fellowship with others, and worship God like everyone else...and then be informed in very direct words by the loving Christians I'm surrounded by that I'm going to burn in hell for my sins of homosexuality.
I know what it's like to be a gay teen and feel rejected and isolated... simply because of the way I was born. I used to hate myself, the world, and even God because of all the crap I was feeling...simply because I thought I was all screwed up... I thought I was twisted and bad.... I thought I was some kind of sinful freak of society. But I got past all that. I figured out that the people who were trying to condemn and destroy me were suffering from their own personal problems.
I am only 15, but I have finally found myself. I am now proud of who I am.... not because I'm gay... but because I know that being gay is okay, and it's only one small part of what makes me who I am. I know that I have many things about me that are great, special, important, and uniquely me. I know now that I can be gay or straight... and the only thing that matters is if my heart is big enough to love... in spite of the hate and rejection shown to me.
So why am I hear? Not to brag or look for awards. I just want to make sure that any other gay teens out there who are suffering like I once was has the chance to understand the truths about this world... themselves... God... and especially love. There may be a lot of reasons for teens, or anyone else to feel guilty and shameful about themselves... but no one has to feel that way.... and especially just because they are gay, bi, lesbian, or transgendered.
At different times in life... many other people were put down and made to feel bad or inferior. Native Americans, blacks, women, etc... and now it's the gays turn to earn the rights to be respected in society. But just like everyone else who wants to be respected... we gays have to prove ourselves... and EARN the respect we seek.
I am proud of the Gay mayor who wins the trust of those who voted for him... but gay porn, I am not PROUD of. I am proud of the gay or lesbian couple who have bought their house and earned respect at their jobs... but the fact that a large percent of teen suicides are due to gay related issues, I am not proud of.
We as caring gay people in this world need to form a crowd to stand up and support those who need love and help.... and I want to be at the front of that crowd... waving my rainbow flag... with my heart and arms wide open. If you are a gay teen and need help of any kind...or if you are anyone who is suffering from depression and confusion about being gay... please find help now. If you don't know where to go... you can start with me. I will be glad to help. But what ever you do, get the help you need so you can feel good about yourself. Don't let other people with hate in their hearts convence you that you're not worth loving.
Take it from me.... LOVE RULES, and you are worth it.
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